Let Us Embrace the Great Falun Buddha Fa Wholeheartedly

St. Louis - Xiaoguang Wang - shared in 1999

Greetings! My revered Teacher. Greetings! My fellow practitioners.

I am Wang Xiaoguang, a practitioner from central U.S., St. Louis. It has been over 5 years since I attained the Fa [began to practise Falun Gong] on January 17th 1994. I would like to give a brief report to Teacher and fellow practitioners about my cultivation experience over these five years. Your comments are greatly appreciated.

To tell the truth, I did not know what I was searching for but I was always searching. It was before I attained the Fa and especially during the five years when I was unemployed. I still remember I lost my job a few years after I graduated from university. I did not feel it was a big deal except losing face. Because of the unemployment, I had plenty of time and started my own pursuits. At that time, I “hunted” in almost every area including Astronomy, Geography, Physics, Literature, History, classical music etc. In the end, I found out that all subjects were connected, and the connection was Philosophy. Then I spent lots of time on studying Philosophy. Finally, I discovered that each theory had its own reasoning. They all seemed to make some sense, but somehow they were not completely right. However, among all the books I read, there was one and only one book that I did not quite understand, which was also my favourite. That was Lao Tsu's Tao De Chi. At that time, I regarded it as the best philosophy in the world.

Around 1991, I learned a popular Qigong [A modern term for traditional cultivation practices] and I felt I made some achievements. Actually, that was nothing more than cheating people by healing diseases with Qi. I considered myself extraordinary and became self-complacent. At that time, for some reason, whenever I saw the living fish bought by my family for our meal, I would feel sad and wanted to set them free. My temperament gradually became calm and stable. However, my neighbours’ attitudes toward me changed. We used to chat and have fun together, but they started to gossip behind my back. At the beginning, I did not care much about it. Later they even said bad words in front of me. That was too much. What should I do? I started to apply my human philosophy. It was easy to deal with the man. I put a knife in front of his face and told him explicitly if he continued making troubles, I would chop his head off. However, it was hard to handle the woman, just as the saying goes, “A decent man will not fight with a woman.” But still, I had to give her a lesson, so that she would not be too reckless. I found out she had heart problems and always boil Chinese medicine (in a shared kitchen). So I asked my sister to prescribe some laxative from the hospital and put it in her medicine cooking pot sneakily. While I studied late at night, I heard her door open and close quite frequently. I knew that the medicine was taking effect. I laughed with my sister. Since then, we lived peacefully together and they did not give me troubles anymore.

At that time, how could I know what cultivation practice is and what Xinxing [Heart/Mind nature] is? Once I dreamt of many beauties in heaven and I loved it so much. When I woke up, I came to a conclusion that it was time for me to look for a girlfriend. Once I had a high fever. While I was unconscious, I clearly saw myself falling into an endless abyss. I was frightened and tried desperately to grab something to stop the falling. But there was nothing to hold on to. I was so scared that I had a cold sweat all over. When I woke up, I asked the nurse for the reason. She told me that was a normal symptom when one got a fever of over 40oC (104oF) to have hallucinations. Since then I dare not think of it anymore. Later, my mother told me that my face got darker and darker while I was practising Qigong. She thought I got sun tanned.

Fortunately, I met a Dafa disciple. It was he who spent one year introducing Falun Gong to me step by step. At the beginning, I felt that the system he was practising was better than mine. However, from my family education, it was said that people from the Northeast were good at talking but not sincere. As the Teacher was from the Northeast, I had doubts about it. As a result, I missed a few lecture series held in Beijing by Teacher. In the summer of 1993, I was fortunate to get the book China Falun Gong. After reading it twice, I felt it was very good. So I called a few of my friends and we started to practise Falun Gong. Later a fortuneteller told me: “You have been wandering outside of the door of Buddhist School for 4 or 5 years, it is time for you to enter the door”. I went to check out temples and attended some Buddhist ceremonies. Nonetheless, I still did not understand anything and remained muddle-headed. It was not until the beginning of 1994 when I attained the Fa, that I truly found my destiny and home. I became clear about what I had been trying to search for. The reason why I talked about the above experience is to tell those who have not entered the door: Do not miss this precious opportunity because of one wrong thought.

After attending the first day’s lecture in Tianjin, I accompanied my girlfriend home riding a bicycle. No matter how hard I tried, I was not able to catch up with her. I was far behind, sweating all over. On the second day and the third day, I was not able to even open a can of coke. However, the strange thing was that I was still very energetic and could eat and drink normally. I did not look like a person with a high fever. After 9 lectures, I got a fever of more than 40oC (104oF) for a week. At that time, I only knew it was a normal reaction of the practice and could be overcome without taking any medicine. That was how I started my Falun Dafa cultivation practice, the turning point of my life. At the beginning of my cultivation, I had ordinary people’s gratitude towards Dafa and I was eager to do things related to Dafa. What I knew was that I had not done enough to return to Teacher, let alone thinking of suffering, tiredness, losses and gains. Through working with veteran practitioners and by the subtle influences from their words and conduct, I gradually understood the uniqueness of Dafa. The unselfish spirit and candid-working attitude of those veteran practitioners deeply touched me. I was like a baby learning from them and gradually started my cultivation journey.

At the beginning of 1995, I got a copy of the newly published Zhuan Falun [The main text of Falun Gong]. I immediately read it twice with great eagerness, but I still found that it was all brand new to me. Since then, I started to read the book, one chapter a day almost everyday. After that, I felt my heart became even more balanced and peaceful. I gradually realised the benefits of reading the book and reading it naturally became my daily habit. When I look back now, every step I made has something to do with this book. It is this very book that guides my cultivation journey and points out my cultivation direction. Of course, I did not know what “studying the Fa” is about at that time and there was no such a term. I just relied on my simple but intuitive understanding and started book reading on my own.

In June 1995, I was fortunate to meet with Teacher Li before I came to study in the U.S.. He told me that, in order for me to cultivate better in the future, I had to go through In-triple-world Fa cultivation a few times. By doing so, more of my ordinary people’s attachments could be eliminated and I could cultivate towards higher levels in the future. He also asked me patiently if it was bearable to continue practising with all my cultivation energy locked up. I sat there like a fool and couldn’t say a word, as if I did not know how to talk. I did not even answer yes or no to Teacher and I regretted it so much.

I also asked myself, how come I could make such speedy progress in this cultivation system? However, I felt I had not been really cultivating yet. With encouragement from the veteran practitioners, I came to the U.S. and started a new page of my life.

I arrived in the U.S. in August 1995 and could no longer be with the respectful veteran practitioners. I entered the money world of MBAs. Day in day out, I only revolved around making money, period. I could hardly adapt to it. Also, being new to the U.S., I was not familiar with the environment and life was quite difficult. All these things added to my homesickness. How great it was to be in China! Why did I come here for this suffering? I could not put up with it and even went to the most dangerous place in the middle of the night. I hoped some drunk would shoot me to death and then my true spirit would return to China and stay with those veteran practitioners. Later, someone hinted to me that I feared suffering and intended to arrange the cultivation path for myself. I became clear-minded and settled my cultivation practice in the U.S..

Being far away from the Teacher and the veteran students, the only thing that I feared of the most was falling behind in my cultivation practice. However, who should I ask if I have questions? It was impossible for me to make international calls all the time and look for someone to answer my questions. Besides, sometimes no one was available! I had nothing with me except Zhuan Falun. So I began my book reading again, one chapter a day and I never dared to be lazy with it. With the fear of falling behind the others, I diligently studied every word of Zhuan Falun and had no thought of gaining or losing levels. I just hoped I could catch up with everyone and others would not forget about me. I just hoped that I would not be too far behind.

Miracles happened right at this time. Because I devoted myself to the Fa, read Zhuan Falun wholeheartedly everyday, and diligently followed the requirement of the Fa, my level increased rapidly. The progress was so fast that I was dumbfounded. I finished In-Triple-World-Fa cultivation twice in a very short time. Sometimes, the cultivation energy increased so fast that I felt very nervous and had to read one more chapter before I could calm down. Not until that time did I realise the effect of studying the Fa and the mighty power of Dafa. Day after day, year after year, I continued the book reading until today. I read Zhuan Falun so many times that a few copies worn out. This is truly a magic book, a heavenly book! Everything I want to know is in it. Later, Teacher published the short articles. After I read them, I found out most of them were already in Zhuan Falun. Why did Teacher say it again? Even I myself did not understand why I had this feeling. In the end, I lost my contacts with the outside world, and I did not feel it was necessary either. I just keep reading the Fa. Everything is in it, from how the universe was created, to how it was destroyed; everything is already laid out there! I just have to read it over! Naturally I did not feel it necessary to contact or exchange opinions with anybody. By studying the Fa diligently, everything will become clear.

I remember a story my current assistant told me, “A child was chasing a flying Falun by running on a rainbow. Suddenly, the rainbow ahead disappeared. If he made one more step, he would fall into a deep abyss. But the child was so focused on the Falun; he bounced to the Falun without caring about anything else. Just at that split moment, the rainbow reappeared. The child was safe, and happily embraced the precious Falun.”

The story gave me great inspirations. On the path of our cultivation practice, if we examine every step with human concepts, we would encounter dangers and dead-ends everywhere. However, if we study the Fa and learn to treat everything that happens to us from a God’s perspective, then everything will become smooth and easy. What is Jing Jie (a realm)? Doesn’t “Jing” refer to boundaries and “Jie” refer to edges? (Doesn’t realm have the meaning of the boundaries and edges of a region?) In mathematics, it’s known that the best answer of a problem is determined by its boundary condition. Just like the centre of a table is determined by its edges. MBA is the study of searching means of maximising profits under different marginal conditions. This boundary in Physics refers to the scopes of definitions. Breaking through the boundary, one would naturally find a new and better solution. Nowadays, people believe they only live this one lifetime, and there is nothing after death, no reincarnation, no reward or retribution. Aren’t those beliefs the boundary condition they build for themselves? Based on that, they develop different concepts and assumptions that lead to their own different viewpoints of life and career?

As cultivators are able to break through different levels, they develop different criteria and perspectives of life. However, if we look back and think it over carefully, aren’t all these changes originated from Falun Dafa? It is Dafa that leads us to break through each level. It cannot be clearer how important it is to study Fa.

As we further study the Fa, the human path will become more and more narrow, but the God’s path will become wider and wider. Tests will follow too. However, as good students, once we study well, tests will become good opportunities to reveal our talents in the universe. How would good students be afraid of tests? Once you understand the principles, even though the tests come in various forms, you will not feel that they are unexpected. In addition, there is no need for others to point out to you how well you studied or which aspect you did well or poorly. Aren’t they pointed out to you by the tests? Those who have self-knowledge will know their own levels and areas to be improved.

I listened to Teacher’s Lecture in San Francisco dozens of times, but I still felt that I could not completely comprehend it. I utilised all my spare time to listen to the cassettes over and over in addition to studying Zhuan Falun as seriously as usual. The more difficult it was to comprehend the lecture, the more I listened to it. After listening to it for about 200 times, I finally found the solution from the shell of the universe’s structure.

Day after day, year after year, I spent almost all my spare time on the Fa and passed severe tests one after another. Of course, I failed some of them. But through studying the Fa and comparing with the requirements of the Fa, I found out my own shortcomings. I steadily improved my Xinxing and I leaped one level after another.

One day in October 1998, I was on my way home after school. I started to feel I could not breathe and I had other symptoms. At that time, I only had one thought, “Hurry up, go home and study the Fa, something is coming up again”. After I studied a few chapters, that feeling subsided and I recovered to normal. When I listened to Teacher’s Geneva Lecture later, I understood what had happened. The boundless Dafa once again manifested its profoundness on my body. I’m actually still like a primary school pupil in the cultivation of Dafa, how could such huge changes happen to me? All this made me more confident and determined to study the Dafa. From then on, I study the Fa and practise genuine cultivation more diligently.

Another half year passed, it seemed that my study of Fa reached an end. No matter how hard I tried, I still felt something was missing. There was an invisible wall in front of me. I banged at the wall, but I couldn’t break it. I increased my reading from one chapter a day to two or three chapters. I’m a slow reader and it would take me 2.5-3 hours for a chapter. With 7-8 hours spent on Fa, I was still not able to make a breakthrough. I was filled with despair and even thought that I wanted to die. Fortunately, I had had the same kind of experience before and it was resolved long ago. Isn’t death just a switch to another dimension? If I do not understand it now, will I be able to understand it by switching to another dimension? I calmed down gradually and started to think it over carefully. I asked myself what exactly I was trying to find in the Fa? What was the wall in front of me all about? I kept thinking about it and my revered Master came into my mind. It was he who travelled to Beijing with merely ¥50 (which is equivalent to under £4) monthly stipend. He braved the wind and rain, and slept in the train station and in a concrete tube. All this was just to bring up several disciples. What a profound and unselfish heart! Isn’t that genuine unselfishness! Does he ever have any thoughts for himself? He has been doing everything for others, for all beings in the universe. However, just take a look at myself, I am so ugly: I want to understand something, I want to know about something, I want to enlighten to higher levels, I want to be better than others… The focus of all this is one word “me”. After such a comparison, several big golden characters appeared in my mind: “Be unselfish, melt into the Fa.” As those characters arose, the invisible wall in front of me disappeared and a splendid and magnificent universe emerged in front of me. Even though I could not see it, I could sense it with my heart. It was right in front of me and surged towards me. I sat there quietly with tears welling up like a fountain. The benevolent Dafa and the unselfish Teacher were bringing me up. It is you, my Teacher, who purifies my heart and saves my soul with this Great Buddha’s Fa. Where else can I find such an unselfish and benevolent Master and this Great Buddha Fa in the world! I kept crying and crying, for abandoning such filthy heart and soul, and for attaining this great Buddha Fa. These rapid changes continued for the next two hours and my limbs were like huge wind gaps. Since then, my cultivation started a new era and I truly understood Teacher’s words about selfishness penetrating to very high levels in the universe.

When sharing my experience with all of you, I do not intend to promote anything about myself, but to tell everyone how precious the Dafa is. No life in the universe should evaluate this great Falun Buddha Fa with his/her own understanding. No life is worth mentioning in comparison to this Dafa. It is said, "once one obtains the Falun, one has already finished half of his/her cultivation"? In fact, it is far more than a half!

Once in my dream, I saw many beautiful fish in heaven. When I got closer to take a look, I found they had been bisected and there were no internal organs or gills. I couldn’t help questioning “how can they survive?” From this dream, I got awakened to the relationship between any life and Fa is just like the relationship between fish and water. No fish can survive if there is no water, no matter how strong the fish is. Only by assimilating to this universal Dafa, will we be able to find our true destiny. Moreover, we are at the great moment of the creation of the new universe. We ought to ask ourselves sincerely, do we deserve it? If we do not study the Fa wholeheartedly, do not do real cultivation or do not appreciate this chance of a lifetime opportunity, are we still worthy of our life, worthy of this unselfish Dafa, and worthy of the Great Master who has endured all the sufferings in the universe and come to offer salvation to us unselfishly day and night.

Of course, I am absolutely not saying how excellently I have cultivated. I am still far away from the true requirements of the Dafa. I have experienced demonic interference from my own mind and extremely severe tribulations. I have faced Teacher’s portrait and said to him: “Just dispose of me. I do not want to continue.” But I cannot let go of this Fa in my heart. It has already melted into my heart. It is Dafa that helped me to overcome ordeals one after another. It is Dafa that points out to me the path to become a God. This Dafa is too good for me to let it go and live without it. It is this Dafa that has corrected the direction of my cultivation journey again and again. How can I live without it?

Finally, I sincerely hope everyone who has predestined relationship can embrace this great Falun Buddha Fa with all their heart. Please study the Fa!