I have just graduated from college with a bachelor's degree and entered society. After struggling in my thinking for a long time, I decided to write this article to help remove some peoples wrong thoughts towards Falun Dafa and the founder of Falun Dafa, Teacher Li Hongzhi.
Like many college students in the new era, even though we doubted the decisions and actions of the Party and hated the unethical episodes that occurred in China, we were nonetheless the young patriots of the nation. We felt bad about the actions of other nations who are against socialism. We became indignant when the Chinese embassy in Yugoslavia was attacked by U.S. Army missiles. We felt shame for the unequal peace declaration signed by our previous government after World War II. We cheered for the reunion of Hong Kong with China. We were excited for every gold medal won by Chinese athletes in the Olympic Games. However, we felt bad about the terrible events happening in our country, because we were expecting to become a nation of freedom and peace.
When we saw corrupt officials in the government, it greatly angered us. Why are these awful things occurring in this great nation? We just couldn't believe it.
When we were studying in the ivory tower of academia, the media throughout China began to smear Falun Gong with lies: we were flooded with propaganda about the staged self-immolation, murder, self-abuse, refusing to take medication whilst ill, etc. The campus was full of pictures of people who had died. As college students who respected science, we were sad for those Chinese people with no scientific knowledge; we both hated and sympathised with those Falun Gong practitioners. However, we did not think carefully about the obviously doubtful points in their logic: Why were so many people practising and cultivating it? Why did those terrible incidents, including the self-immolation, murder, and self-abuse, never happen before the 20th of July, 1999? Did they occur at the same time according to some schedule? During our regular political studies, the teachers in the college required us to smear Falun Gong according to the lies. We did not, however, have a chance to read the books the contain the teachings of Falun Dafa. There was always a doubt in our minds: Why were there so many intellectuals practising and cultivating in Falun Dafa? We wanted to know the truth but were afraid of being involved.
When I was a freshman in college, I got to know my boyfriend. We came to know each other over the Internet. He was living in southern China, which is very far from my place. Although the telephone and letters nurtured our love, I felt that there was a mysterious force compelling me to spend the rest of my life with him. I never related our love to Falun Gong at that time. On day in the summer of 2001, two years after we fell in love, he told me that he was a Falun Gong practitioner. My heart was full of shock and disgust. Even though I knew he was good person-- he never smoked, gambled, or was unkind-- I got angry and tried to force him to make a decision between me and Falun Gong. My mind was full of the frightening pictures of the self-immolation. I was afraid that, if I lived with him, what I would do if he did not want to take medicine when he fell ill? And what I would do if he did something unreasonable? He said that the reports on the television were false. I would not listen to any of his explanations and felt that our two-year relationship was drawing to a close. He said that he would not give up Falun Dafa, yet neither would he give up on me. My mind was blank. I believed that he was addicted to it, and I began to resent Falun Dafa.
I spent the following days in constant emotional pain and regret. I could not stop thinking about him and I didn't want to lose what we once had. When I tried to forgive him, the idea that he was a Falun Gong practitioner immediately came to my mind. In the end, I decided to continue to keep in contact with him. We began to avoid talking about this topic. Sometimes I hinted that I was hoping he would stop practising. I knew he wanted to use his kindness to move my heart. From then on, I began to say good words about Falun Dafa and began to doubt the lies in the reports. When other people were smearing Falun Dafa, I felt really bad.
I began to respond to him more and more. I felt that he was such a good man, and that good men are not easily found. I would definitely marry him. That year I graduated from college. When I returned home after graduation, he also came all the way from southern China. Within several days my parents were very pleased with him, and their minds would be at ease if I married him.
We experienced many difficulties in the days we were together. I almost collapsed after each long distance we had to travel. Finally we found a place to settle down and both of us found suitable jobs. At that time, we still tried to avoid talking about Falun Dafa. I hoped to lead a normal but happy life. Unfortunately, after a physical exam, I lost my job after working for just one month because my health did not meet the employer's requirements. I cried and told my husband the entire story, but he never treated me with hostility because of my illness. He just smiled and said, "You can practise Falun Gong. There is no problem about your health. Don't worry."
Even though the disease I had was not severe, it was hard to cure. I thought that perhaps Falun Dafa might save my life. When I returned home, I began to watch the Falun Gong CD's that explain what Falun Gong is and the true reasons behind the persecution. At that time, I awoke--it turned out that the government-controlled TV station was telling lies. "Goodness" was now "bad," and the people who believed in "Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance" were being persecuted so severely. Chinese people were so cruel that they could torture their fellowmen in such a horrible way. The central television station garbled all the facts, telling lies so as to deceive an enormous number of kind Chinese people.
My heart was full of conflict, so I began to think methodically. I began to listen to Teacher's lectures on the teachings in Falun Gong that he gave in Guangzhou. At first I tried to use the lies to defend my thoughts against Falun Dafa, because I did not want to feel disappointed in my country. When I listened to the lecture carefully, however, I found that the content of the lecture was sound and every sentence was well justified. I realised the unfairness suffered by those who practise Falun Dafa. I felt sad towards those who were used by Jiang Zemin and his regime to carry out such horrible acts against those who practise Falun Gong.
Because I was influenced by the rigid concepts of modern science and polluted by the lies, in my first month of practising cultivation, I still couldn't accept the Fa (law or principles, the teachings in Falun Gong) completely. After all my illness's disappeared, however, I stopped doubting, because I clearly felt the might of Falun Dafa. I saw how the Falun Gong practitioners nearby behaved, and I too tried my best to study the Fa and behave according to the Fa.
I understood that Jiang himself, out of his own jealousy, initiated the persecution of Falun Dafa. To build up his power, he began to persecute and suppress Falun Gong practitioners in such an inhumane way and at the expense of this whole nation with his policy of "defame their reputations, bankrupt them financially, and destroy them physically." So many Chinese people like me have been deceived by their lies. Their cruelty was much more severe even than that of the "Cultural Revolution."
With this article I hope that I can awaken the Chinese people with my conscience. I hope that people will not make the same mistake I did and believe the lies. Please try to find out about Falun Gong firsthand!
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