While I was imprisoned in a forced labour camp, the guards tortured me by depriving me of sleep. I lacked strong righteous thoughts and wrote a guarantee statement. Although I later stated that it was invalid, as a Falun Gong practitioner, I should never have written it. My long-lasting regret of having done so, with a human mindset, resulted in my suffering from sickness karma. And because I had the sickness karma, I was allowed leave the forced labour camp before my sentence expired. Back home, I returned to Fa-rectification work to save sentient beings, however, I could not rid myself of the attachment of sickness karma. Even now, I have not completely eliminated the attachment.
After I left the forced labour camp, I was working in our family business with my wife. One time I went by bicycle to the transportation station to purchase some goods. My wife warned me to be careful and not to lose the bike. I carelessly responded, "If the old bicycle doesn't go, then a new one will not come." My thought had permitted stealing to manifest. At the station, I parked my bicycle. When I returned with the goods, my bicycle had disappeared.
Because our family business was very slow, my wife found me a job outside the business, escorting and transporting one of our relatives. This job required me to work day and night, leaving me no time to do the three things required by Teacher. Although I knew I should not have taken the job, I still went along with the idea because I could not let go of human sentimentality for my wife, and I feared she would misunderstand me.
During one trip with my relative, on the way back, we were passing through dense fog. At that moment, a thought suddenly appeared in my mind, "If something dangerous happens, I will be able to use it as a sound excuse to stop doing this work." At that moment, I did not evaluate this thought based on the principles taught in Falun Gong and did not deny it with righteous thoughts. The result was that we did have an accident, and I broke my leg. So, if we do not treat trouble with righteous thoughts, it will be impossible for us to redeem a loss.
I wrote about my experience hoping that other practitioners will take heed. We have to judge each one of our thoughts with the Falun Gong teachings and treat them seriously. We should not hide our attachments to achieve our own desires. If we do, we have permitted unrighteous thoughts to exist. When we do not treat matters with strong righteous thoughts and even regard bad thoughts as our own, we have acknowledged the persecution and interference. The evil can then take the advantage of our weak points. Under these circumstances, it will be impossible to deny the arrangements by the old forces, and trying to follow the path arranged by Teacher will be nothing more than empty talk. Cultivation is most serious and has no room for neglect.
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