I am a 29-year-old practitioner. Almost everyone in my family practices Falun Gong, including my parents, three uncles, and one aunt. The illnesses that bothered my parents for many years disappeared quickly after they began cultivation. My younger sister and I also took up the practice once we witnessed so many positive changes in my parents. Master soon purged my body and changed me from a sick person into a bubbly young woman. My sister had her third eye opened. She could often see beautiful scenes in other dimensions. Dafa has brought wonders to our entire family.
When 20 years old, in 1999, I attended college away from home. Those four years of schooling reduced me to a non-practitioner. After graduation I took a job in that same town. One year later I quit and returned to my hometown, where I saw other practitioners for the first time and observed them sending righteous thoughts. I sat there quietly watching. I felt very sacred and wanted to do the same, but somehow I just couldn't become one of them.
My mother was arrested in September 2004 and sent to a forced labour camp. I suddenly awakened and realized the meaning, importance, and seriousness of sending righteous thoughts, clarifying the truth. and practicing cultivation. I reflected on the path I had walked thus far.
I had fought for my personal interests and would do anything to reach my goals. At work I was my own boss and would not tolerate anything different. With so many attachments, my mindset was even lower than that of a non-practitioner. For the past several years, my time for Fa-study and exercises had amounted to almost none. While other practitioners were busy clarifying the truth and offering sentient beings, I was fighting for my own interests. When they sent righteous thoughts at the top of every hour, I was sound asleep. When they were shouting, "Falun Dafa is good" at Tiananmen Square, I was singing love songs in bars. I declared, "I am a practitioner," yet as a practitioner, what had I done?
I cried, "Master, from now on I will return to cultivation. I want nothing non-practitioners long for, and I only hope to return home with you."
I went to visit practitioners I knew through my mother and got copies of Master's lectures. They shared thoughts with me, which was very helpful. I still encountered some difficulties, yet my determination was unshakable.
A Lesson Learned
I used to teach at a private school and knew that was an opportunity Master arranged for me to offer people salvation. I told my students to behave according to Truth-Compassion-Forbearance and advised them to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations. All my students eagerly withdrew from the Young Pioneers.
But, because I lacked experience clarifying the truth, the evil could take advantage of me. Soon, the school headmaster summoned me and told me she wouldn't allow me to talk about Truth-Compassion-Forbearance in class. Nevertheless, because I was a hard-working teacher with an excellent performance record, she didn't want to fire me, either, but I couldn't continue my truth-clarification in the classroom. I questioned what could be wrong with Truth-Compassion-Forbearance and talked a lot more with her. She wasn't too receptive, so I quit my job.
I soon launched a tutoring class of my own. This time I was able to clarify the truth with wisdom. Parents felt very comfortable leaving their children in my care. All these students withdrew from the Young Pioneers, and some of the parents also quit the CCP.
When it came to my personal life, however, I had trouble. I couldn't get along with my mother-in-law, and, as a result, I had issues with my husband as well. I knew I should become more magnanimous but found it was rather difficult to let go of my attachments. In the end, at my husband's insistence, we divorced, which was a huge blow to me at the time. I never thought that would ever happen to me. I felt I couldn't face my family, friends, Master, or fellow practitioners. I cried a lot. When I came to my senses, I knew the only thing left for me to do was to be more diligent in my cultivation.
Later I met a male practitioner who offered me much help with my cultivation. I was able to improve quickly then. Not long after, we were married. At first I thought it would be much easier to cultivate since we both were practitioners. But I was wrong. My husband was very appreciative of our newly established family and spent a lot of time tending to both sides of our family and his work. He gradually slacked off in his cultivation. At the same time I felt content with his tender love for me.
Master always advises us to study the Fa more. Yet, I failed to devote enough time to Fa-study and didn't have a clear understanding of Fa principles when I encountered conflicts. After a period of time in my new marriage, I realized that as practitioners we must let go of our lust and sexual desire. However, my husband felt it would be OK as long as we conformed to non-practitioners' standards. I was upset and thought I should never have remarried. Our relationship became quite tense, and we felt emotionally exhausted. The evils exploited our omissions. My husband was reported and sent to a forced labour camp. In order to avoid persecution, I left home and went to another city.
Constantly Improving Myself through Group Fa Study
I lost contact with my family and practitioners in this new place where I lived. I looked everywhere for a job. Initially I was positive, thinking it should be a snap for me, given my abilities and experience, but was turned down every time. I began to send righteous thoughts to negate the economic persecution the old forces imposed on me. At the same time I looked within myself and realized I still had a big ego. I asked Master to please help me find a job that allowed time for Fa study. Just a couple of days later I got a job offer and started to work right away. Often it was just me in the office so I could study the Fa or practice the exercises. The work was easy and merely required very simple computer operations.
I asked Master to help me get in touch with other practitioners. With Master's arrangement I found some practitioners and joined them for group Fa study. Seeing them doing well in cultivation I noticed my own gaps. From that point on I also began to diligently study and memorize the Fa and do the three things (study the Fa [the teachings of Falun Dafa], send forth righteous thoughts and clarify the truth about Falun Dafa and about the persecution to the world's people) well. During my time in this city I felt the power of group Fa study deeply and was able to see my shortcomings and relinquish my fear. Everyone looked within, and we reminded each other to strive forward in cultivation. We had a really pleasant time together. I came to understand why Master asks us to persist in group study.
Clarify the Truth to Offer Sentient Beings Salvation
After I improved my xinxing (hart and mind character), I realized how bitter life was for everyone who was still fighting for trivial interests. Even if a person owned everything in the human world, he still could not escape death. How many people have died from earthquakes and other natural disasters! I came to see the importance of clarifying the truth to sentient beings, and I vowed to cherish every one of them and let them know that Falun Dafa is good.
I began to clarify the truth to my dorm mates. The initial results were poor. I looked within, to see if I still had fear and an attachment to validating myself. Practitioners also taught me how to clarify the truth. Later on, when I talked to my dorm mates again, I was compassionate. I quietly listened to them to see what their concerns were, and then responded accordingly. I was eventually able to get them to quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations.
I moved to two other dorms. I clarified the truth to every dorm mate at each location, and almost every one withdrew from the CCP and its affiliated organizations. Some of them even urged me to pay attention to my safety.
During my truth-clarification I realized the importance of reading the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. Reading the booklet itself was a process of purifying my own field and eliminating the CCP spectre. Only by knowing the evil nature of the CCP myself could I do better exposing the CCP.
In my experience, we must not harbour any hatred toward the CCP during truth-clarification. Otherwise, people will feel we were not compassionate enough. I often open the conversation by bringing up the CCP corruption, which often resonates with the listener. Sometimes I say that I saw a certain website that indicated over 48 million people had withdrawn from the CCP and its affiliated organizations. Then I offer to help the listener to withdraw. Often the effect has been good.
On August 15 last year, an outdoor vocal contest was held at a neighbourhood plaza. Many people competed by singing CCP-themed songs. The audience clapped and sang along. I felt very sad and began to send righteous thoughts to eliminate any factors deterring their salvation. Then I went on stage and sang a Dafa song. When the other singers were performing, the volume was low. However, when I opened my mouth, everyone calmed down and the volume on the microphone suddenly increased. People looked at me attentively and gently clapped. I looked around as I sang. When I made eye contact with everyone, I offered them sincere blessings. After I finished singing, I sang it a second time. I truly felt the aware side of everyone was so eager to know the truth.
It is now much easier for me to pinpoint my attachments, but getting rid of these attachments is another matter. I must constantly study the Fa to remove my notions to recognition, personal interests, and emotions. Once I have relinquished certain attachments, I can feel ease, joy, and lightness. I will never return to the old me. I realize that as long as we believe in Master and the Fa and remain firm in our cultivation, there is nothing we cannot overcome, just as Master said,
"Cultivation is hard. It's hard in that even when a terrible calamity strikes, even when evil madly persecutes, and even when your life is at stake, you still have to be able to steadfastly continue on your path of cultivation without letting anything in human society interfere with the steps you take on your path of cultivation." ("Path" from Essentials for Further Advancement II)
I've found the biggest difference between the old and the new me to be the realization that I am now a person who is completely willing to assimilate into the Fa. I am a Dafa particle, and I am a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. I thank Master for bestowing upon my fellow practitioners and me such a great title.
Master, please rest assured that I will not let you down and that I will do the three things well. Fellow practitioners, let us be more diligent and strive forward to return home with Master!
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