Am I Truly Cultivating Diligently Every Day?

I went to Beijing to attend my daughter's wedding during the summer break. My husband and I stayed at a hotel one night. It was 11:00 p.m. and I was studying the Fa when I received a call from the front desk about a security check. In a moment, two policemen were knocking on the door. When we opened the door they gave us a lecture about the importance of a security check for the sake of the so-called "60th anniversary of the National Day." They asked me, "Do you practice Falun Gong?" I began to argue with them. They threatened me, "You will be sent to the police station if you say you practice Falun Gong. If you say you don't practice Falun Gong, you will be all right." I then said something against my conscience, as I didn't want to be carried to the police station. I was overcome with regret afterward, as I knew I had failed a major test.

After I returned home, I read Master's newly-published lecture, "Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference," and had a better understanding of what had just happened to me. In the lecture, Master said,

"Nothing happens in cultivation without a reason. When incorrect states and bad human conduct surface among us, those things have come to target human attachments. We don't acknowledge the old forces' arrangements, but, when we fail to do well they will exploit our gaps. So, perhaps it was that a particular place needed to be targeted in that manner, and that was why an incident happened."

"As sinister as the evil may be, it wouldn't dare to do that. The old forces' factors are bold enough to play the role they do among Dafa disciples precisely because you have the human thinking that I described and needed such people to appear."

Master's teaching awakened me. The reason why such an incident happened to me was precisely because I had human thinking, and the old forces' factors exploited my gaps. First of all, I failed to cultivate compassion well. Whenever I heard the policeman talking about Falun Gong, I became enraged. I forgot that he was a sentient being to be saved. Master said,

"If you, as Dafa disciples, want to effect change in a person when you clarify the truth and want to save him, you must not arouse the negative elements in that person. You must hold to being shan (compassionate), and only then can you resolve problems that may arise and save that person."

"The greatest manifestation of shan is compassion, and it is an expression of tremendous energy. It can disintegrate all that is not right."

Secondly, I didn't have strong righteous thoughts as I was fearful. I didn't want to "be arrested by the evil." But the underlying reason was my fear and lack of righteous thoughts. If I had strong righteous thoughts, the policeman wouldn't have intimidated me. Even if he did, I would not be affected.

Lastly, the incident exposed my attachment to sentiment. When I saw how fearful my husband was, I was afraid to worry him. All of these human thoughts attracted the evil test, and my attachment was exploited by the evil forces.

From this incident, I have a deep understanding of how serious cultivation is. There can be no compromise. We must lose all attachments. Otherwise, they become an excuse for the evil old forces to persecute us.