Looking Inward

Venerable Master! Dear Practitioners!

My name is Johan and I started practicing Falun Dafa in the spring of 2005.

One day on a hot late summer day, my wife and I were sitting in our apartment working on our computers on Dafa projects. We decided to cool off with a walk in the nearby forest.

In the forest there are steep cliffs that plunge into the sea. As we were walking up the mountain, I took a leap from one large rock to another and felt a stab in my thigh near my hip.

I didn’t think any more about it and it didn’t bother me much. When we got home, I cleared some weeds in the garden without any problems.

When I woke up the next morning, I couldn’t move my right leg without pain in my hip. The pain radiated from my hip, buttock, and into my groin when I tried to support my leg.

I pushed my legs up into double lotus and meditated for an hour hoping it would help. It hurt quite a bit but I could endure an hour of practice. Afterwards, there was no difference.

It was hard to sleep and the next day I managed to limp to work. It was painful to get in and out of the car and at work I was able to raise my desk so I could stand and work. It was too painful to get in and out of a chair so I stood and worked all day.

At first I thought it was karma elimination but then I realized it had to do with my cultivation, but what? I couldn’t think of any conflict or anything like that recently. I really couldn’t figure out what it was.

Suddenly it hit me. A few days earlier I had been working on posting truth-clarification articles on social media. Nowadays when you open social media, the flow on these media is full of violent and sexual content.

I suddenly realized that, unconsciously and guided by my attachments, I had let my gaze and mind linger on these videos and pictures as I scrolled through the stream.

I am aware that one of my fundamental attachments is lust, which has been present early in my life long before cultivation and has created trials for me in my cultivation, and I know that I must guard every thought about this. I remembered Master’s Fa about this in “Zhuan Falun” lecture 9:

”Therefore, this present, objectively existing environment seriously interferes with our practitioners’ cultivation toward high levels. Nude pictures are displayed right over there, hanging in the middle of the street. Once you look up, you will see them.”

I also became aware of a new attachment that I had not noticed before.

Recently, there has been a lot of media reporting about robberies and violence in society. Unconsciously, I have begun to think that if it happened to me, I would fight the criminal in various ways. These thoughts popped up from time to time when I saw such headlines and articles.

So when I saw videos on social media of criminals receiving violent retribution, I felt amused and thought that this criminal was receiving karmic retribution and if it happened to me, the criminal would have to taste the same lesson.

Master says in “Zhuan Falun”, Lecture 6, in Demonic Interference in Cultivation: 

”Once this person falls asleep, someone will seek him out for a fight, and this makes his night restless. Actually, this is the time to remove his attachment to competitiveness. If this competitive mentality is not relinquished, he will always be this way. As time passes, he still cannot move beyond this level after several years.”

I realized that I had an attachment to competition and when I look back on my life, I realize that it has been with me all along. The day after I had thought through these things, my leg had miraculously recovered.

Letting Down Your Guard

During Shen Yun, I collaborated with a Chinese practitioner for a while. I was bothered by the fact that I perceived the practitioner as reserved and sometimes difficult to get hold of.

I shared with the Chinese practitioner that I think that Chinese people, unlike other people, protect themselves and that, for example, they do not talk about their family or private life. Westerners, on the other hand, are more than happy to do so and talk openly and honestly about their children, relatives, if they are doing well or if they have illnesses, are born or die.

We shared a quote from the Fa Teaching Given at the 2004 Western U.S. Fa Conference, where Master said: ”Every facet of society is corrupt, lies just roll right off the tongue of today’s Chinese people, to them lying is as normal as making small talk, and there’s nothing they’re ashamed to do.”

The practitioner shared his understanding on the matter and said, “I don’t lie deliberately, but if I don’t want to tell you something, I won’t say anything,” and smiled.

I was bothered by the comment and then thought that this is exactly what protecting one’s attachments is all about.

When we parted ways, I was bothered that I hadn’t gotten the practitioner to accept my understanding, but that it was surely not a coincidence that I heard this and that it must have something to do with me.

The next day when I started the car, the radio automatically turned on and a radio program started. The voice on the radio read a poem. The poet read a poem about honesty.

Honesty is not shying away from either your joy or despair, like opening your eyes in the salty sea even though it stings, the poet said and the radio program ended. 

I turned off the radio and sat silent and moved, thinking: Nothing happens by chance and when Master sees that I am willing to improve, He will use anything to enlighten me, whether it is the mouth of others or even a radio program.

I realized that over time I unconsciously built up a defense to protect my shortcomings and weaknesses and sometimes felt an uncomfortable feeling when people became inquisitive about me personally, which I think is about some type of fear and reputation of not showing myself weak or capable on various points.

I wanted to be free from this uncomfortable feeling and answer people’s questions openly and honestly, and feel an inner emptiness and openness in interactions with others.

Later, I talked to another practitioner on the phone and we shared about cultivation. The practitioner said that he felt it was easy to share with me because I didn’t try to hide anything.

I took it as Master encouraging me and that I was on the right track and had begun to improve.

Later, when I read “Zhuan Falun” Lecture 1, this passage stood out:

“Therefore, the Tao School believes in the cultivation of Zhen to nurture one’s nature; one should tell the truth, do things truthfully, become a truthful person, return to the original, true self, and in the end, become a true person through cultivation.”

Previously, I thought this passage was about the Tao school, but now I understand that it is about a fundamental level of Truth in the principle of the universe: Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance.

Looking inward is the tool we have been given in cultivation. I understood that every second thoughts rush through my head about all the things I see and every time an incorrect thought appears, I am given a chance to look inward and I could elevate myself every second if I had that wisdom but at my current level it is only in the obvious trials that I take the chance to elevate myself. As a practitioner, I believe that we are given countless chances to elevate in order for us to quickly reach our predetermined level but that only in a few cases do we understand that it is time to look inward even though so many chances are given to us practitioners. Maybe that is why Master is extending the time for Fa-rectification as the powerful illusion and the interference by the old forces make it difficult for us to quickly cultivate up.

At the “Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference”, Master said: ”As Dafa disciples, you just cultivate according to this Fa. Master once said, “Set your cultivation goal as high as you want, as long as you dare to!””

I understand that when you see attachments in others, it is just a reminder that you carry the same attachment yourself. In countless articles, Master addresses the importance of looking inward, including at the “Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference”. 

Also, at the “Fa Teaching at the 2019 New York Fa Conference”, Master said:

”This is because Master has said that anything you encounter in your life, as long as you have stepped into the cultivation community, is not accidental, and everything is for the sake of your improvement. Yet how many of you look externally; not only do you look externally, you have become very cunning.”

and He also said in the same lecture:

”Facing conflicts, no matter who is to blame, you have to look inside yourself first. As a cultivator, if you cannot establish this habit, if you cannot see things in ways opposite to that of humans, you will forever remain human; at least when it comes to that particular step that you fail to do well, you are human.”

I hope I can become better at using this magical tool, looking inward, this Fa weapon that Master gave us in the Fa-rectification and which I understand is what “Diligently Making Progress” is.

Thank you, revered Master, for your saving grace and wisdom! 

Thank you, fellow practitioners!

(This article was presented at the 2025 Nordic Fa-Conference)