Eliminating the Pursuit of Fame and Self-Interest

I started practicing Falun Gong in 1998. Falun Dafa made me realize that the purpose of human existence is to return to one's origin. I held myself to the standards of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance to be a good, and increasingly better, person in society. I also sensed our benevolent Teacher's presence at my side, reminding me, correcting me, guiding the path of my cultivation.

I work in a Communist Party media. As long as I send forth righteous thoughts, tasks that require the glorification of the Party, and the rivalry between colleagues for fame and self-interest never affect me. I managed to rise above these complex circumstances. However, whenever I drop my guard, evil elements disturb me. Only by keeping my heart on the Fa am I able to turn these elements into opportunities for upgrading Xinxing (heart and mind nature) and thus, transform disaster into fortune.

At work, I am the editor of a column. I often need to work in the field making direct face to face contact with members of the community. For years I ventured into on-the-scene work or procured first-hand accounts. Unlike other columns, my column presents first-hand content only. Its hard facts and real-life examples make it one of the most popular columns around. However, in a recent meeting about column changes, a supervisor gave my editorial position to a young colleague, leaving me with only the job of procuring resources. The excuse was to let this colleague complete the minimum work requirement for the month.

I calmly told the supervisor that the column's editorial and procuring work were one, and giving the editorial duties to this colleague would only be throwing a title at him so that he could complete the work requirement. This would only encourage the practice of taking credit for someone else's work. The supervisor declined to change his decision. I then told him with an air of resentment that, if things were to happen in this manner, I would refuse to do my remaining work of procuring resources. Afterwards, my discomfort grew the more I thought about it.

Upon returning home and studying the Fa, I calmed down and came to the conclusion that, as a practitioner, I had acted very poorly. How could these situations be mere coincidences? How could I quibble over such conflicts like an everyday person? Was my Xinxing that low? What a huge attachment to fame and self-interest this was! We should be saving people, and even if we can't save them, we must leave them the splendour of the Fa. I then realized that because I was preoccupied with work, I had neglected my study of the Fa for quite a while. Thus, upon coming across a trying situation, I could not act according to the Fa.

By studying the Fa diligently, I understood that I was ruled by my attachment to fame and self-interest. After enlightening to this point, I received a phone call from the supervisor a few days ago, telling me to procure first-hand resources for the aforementioned column. It will be used for a full column. This time, I obliged with true calm.

I am fortunate to live during the teaching of Dafa, and to have become a practitioner in Fa rectification. I must shed all human attachments and walk the path of cultivation correctly and steadily. In the brief time remaining, I must perform do the three things (study the Fa, clarify the truth about the persecution, send forth righteous thoughts) of Fa rectification well and return to my true self under Teacher's guidance.

Restricted as I am by my level of cultivation, I would appreciate kind suggestions from my fellow practitioners for improving the points I need to work on.